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Sunday, September 16, 2007, 6:27 AM
I was busy rummaging my cupboard. I don't know what I'm looking for and I found this folded paper. It was the conversation, I chatted with Hyra. It was 23rd when we had a big fight. We fighted and the next day, I confronted her. And things went on blablabla. God knows how much I miss her right now. And it's coming to the end of the year. Oh God, time flies so fast. Oh golly, how many times must I say that. I wish I could turn back the hands of time, I wish it was January back where we had all these fun moments together. So anyway, today is the 3rd/4th,dont mind me as I'm lazy to count, day we're fasting. Cool kan. Last year, I almost break-fast, not fasting, it's DIDN'T FAST the whole month. Now I want to make my life change for the better. That sentence I mentioned made Amy laughed. He knew I was like macam faham. I know there's nothing to do to make all these wonderful times come back, but I am very sure I'm gonna make something more happening than that. Still, I have a sense of guilt, and I need to tell it to someone whom I care all this while. I don't want to tell lies anymore. I'm not saying that I always tell lies lah, but I don't want this lie becomes why we are now. We're not that close like before, and it's been months,you know. And each time he got himself a lover, I'd be the jealous one for no reason. Wait,for some reason. You know lah. This is my blog, so this is the right time to confess all my feelings I've hid all this while. I miss him, my feelings for him fade away,but eversince I met him again, I was like "whaaaat,am I feeling now". So now, I'm to get over him and it works like 70-90percent. I can no longer hallucinate okay. I'm not saying I'm a crazy person, hallucinating like what the hell. It's just that I have the feeling of being his wife or girlfriend or something. Okay, back to reality.
New guy,hmm that one I have to think twice. New future,new life. What about the new me? Will I change for the better, or somehow I'll change to adjust my life just like last time, when you know my past was already, in malay words, HANCUR KEBABAI. We'll see. I'll just pray, hm, I don't pray that much. You know, busy with other things. Hopefully, I change eh. (:
And Eeqa could not stop laughing when I cursed Ashraf to get run over by toilet company truck. Laugh all you want,people.